Syncopated Rhythm

Our schedule has gone COMPELTELY haywire.  First of all, things have been very out of the ordinary recently (both sets of parents visiting, Ilan is home from work).  But second of all, the babies are making huge developmental changes right now.

One of them I have mentioned, that they are sleeping really long stretches at night.  Minus the nights we tried to put them back into the crib before the cold disappeared (it’s still lingering, they’re still in the chairs, it’s not worth it because those nights were just a disaster), they seem to still be doing 6-9 hour stretches, which is amazing.  I am NOT complaining about that.

Other developmental leaps:

Eitan

• Really, when we talk about the sleep routine it is all Eitan’s developmental leap.  Noa probably would have been doing this weeks ago but we have to go on his schedule.  So yay!  Long stretches at night!
• He has begun to really see things, to really look at things, and kind of go for things with his hands.  If I put a toy in his lap he will stare at it.  He looks for me when I’m not in his immediate field of vision.
• Eitan also has become quite cheerful.  He was smiling for a while but now he smiles SO MUCH when he is well-rested.
• He also has discovered that the only place he wants to nap is on someone.  I really want to train him out of it because I can’t do that all the time but oh it’s so cute.

Noa

• Noa has found her hands!  She has also found other things, and is grabbing things with her hands.  Sometimes I can just give her a toy and she will sit there with it, examining it, touching it, etc, for a while.  This also means her hands are always in her mouth, making it hard for her to eat (have to keep shoving the boob or bottle past those little iron fists) and also making her quite drooly.
• She’s been in the jolly jumper thing and LOVES it.  It’s the harness on the bungee that hangs from the doorframe.  She will bounce and bounce and bounce until she exhausts herself.  She especially bounces when she hears music.
• She has also started wanting to sit up, so we have begun introducing the bumbo seat.  She’s not really ready for it so she only gets to be in it for a minute or two at a time, but she definitely wants to sit up.
• Does. Not. Want. To. Nap. …. Ever.

The thing is, how does one have time for all of this in the short span of day available?  Today they slept until 7:30am (9pm – 7:30am with a short feeding at 5:30) and we start dinner / bed time proceedings at 5pm.  That’s less than 12 hours and somewhere in there they have to eat 5-6 times, and each feeding takes at least an hour start to finish… that is less than 5 hours of their “day” that is not spent feeding, so of COURSE they don’t want to nap for 3 hours of it!

I tried desperately to get them to take naps during the day but they weren’t having it until 4pm when they were both exhausted.  So, okay, fine, have a short nap, but they had to do it ON ME.  And then Noa was Little Miss Overtired Crankypants.

My hope is that they will soon decrease the number of feedings they have an instead increase the amounts they take at feedings so we don’t have to basically cluster feed all day.  This is what it felt like we have been doing the last few days.  Eat eat eat eat eat, with maybe a few minutes for activity gym time or holding time, and also lots of me desperately trying to get them to take naps.  I’ve been successful at getting them to fall asleep – that is not the problem – but staying asleep for more than 15 minutes is just not happening during the day (except when it’s around dinner time and pre-bed-time, which is when I DON’T want them to nap!).

We have not read a single baby book besides the happiest baby book, which is really just about soothing colicky infants.  So we don’t know what is developmentally appropriate in terms of sleep.  We just know they aren’t getting enough of it during the day, considering the major crash that Noa often has at the end of the day.  If I could just get her to take a one-hour nap sometime during the day that would be amazing.  Yesterday we all napped as a family- don’t tell anyone but the babies napped on our chests (gasp!).  Last night they were delicious!  But this is not feasible as a long term strategy!

It’s causing me a lot of anxiety.

I just have to believe that they will start increasing their intake at each meal so they don’t have to eat as frequently.  Already today they had 1.5x their normal feeding at the 11am feeding, and in a way dropped one feeding later on in the day.  If they could eat 5 times a day instead of 7, we’d have much more time for other things, like naps in addition to all the play time they want to have.

Once everything settles again in January we can find our rhythm once more.  It will be different than it was before, which is fine.  I just need to find it.  Right now it feels too syncopated for my comfort.

This is the cold that doesn't end...

Yes it goes on and on my friends!

Somebody gave it to us but we didn’t know it then

But now we’re snot sucking noses every night just because this is the cold that doesn’t end… yes it goes on and on my friend…



Two full weeks of snot.  Two full weeks of having them sleep in their rocking chairs or else they are up every hour because they can’t breathe.  Two full weeks of two snotty, crabby babies (who are admittedly adorable when they don’t feel so congested).

GUYS.

WHEN WILL THIS COLD END?

I wish I could neti pot the babies!

We are now getting desperate for these poor little guys.  Yes we desnot, and give them saline drops, and bring them in for a shvitz (turn on the shower and get the room all steamy like a sauna).  I’m buying the baby vapo rub stuff (not planning to rub it on their skin but on a cloth and attach it their swaddles / jammies) and the nose frida.  Seriously, if there was a baby neti pot, I would try it.  I guess that’s the nose frida.  Bleh.  It grosses me out but they are suffering and therefore so are we!

eitan won't nap

Correction

In case you believe our babies smile and sleep all the time from the pictures you've seen, I'd like to correct you.

But they are still cute, even while screaming in my face...

LONG long long long day.

It started with trying to switch formulas because Eitan has been having bad reflux, which resulted in non-stop crying. I was asleep because it was my shift to sleep overnight, but the nonstop crying woke me up, so I went out to help. I ended up sitting with Eitan lying on my chest for the rest of the early morning hours (4-8am), with him periodically waking up to cry and writhe in pain, and then fall back to sleep. You can imagine how much sleep I got (not much).

Then today I decided we should go shopping because it’s the only day I have to go shopping for many many weeks, and I want to try on some clothes. By the way, this was a terrible idea. But I wanted to get out. So we loaded up and left. It was exhausting. The babies didn’t have a good night so how could I imagine they would have a good day after a bad night? And Ilan was exhausted and didn’t want to be out long. And I was starting to melt down internally at how my body looks foreign to me, and terrible in everything, and why bother buying clothes.

Then we got home and it was a feeding frenzy on Daylight Savings Time, which means 4-10pm, which I guess in some ways is better than 5-11pm. And both of them were screaming, and Noa was refusing the boob, and I was losing patience. She ended up with a bottle, Eitan nursed, and I gave them baths, and now they are asleep.

THANK GD.

We had a little cake, folded laundry, and now I’m going to bed. They’ll probably be up in an hour. Sigh. Daylight savings SUCKS, by the way! Babies and cats do not understand time changes!

And so this isn’t a total ranty post, here is Eitan in a cute sweater made of scratchy yarn that he hated and we ended up taking it off somewhere along the way (putting on a back-up sweater). I mean he is just adorable in it. But we can never use it again, sadly. It really is very scratchy, I don’t blame him for being uncomfortable. (I bought a couple of fleece outerwear things while we were out that are super soft and hopefully will not bother him)

And here is Noa also bundled up ready for the trip.  She kind of looks like Ilan's niece here... SO CUTE!

I also got her a matching fleece outwear thing because, omg, BEAR EARS!  Can't wait to take pictures of them wearing their bear ear fleeces!

How to do the laundry

Step 1:

Step 2:

Do the laundry.

Sweet moment at the end of a trying day

I wrote this last night but forgot to publish it until today... 


Today was my actual first day alone and it started off so well.  Both babies were sleeping at the same time when I got up (Ilan did the last morning feeding before going to work) and I thought, wow, I think I am on track for another great day!

So what do I do?  Go ahead and MESS IT UP by putting both babies on my chest.

Oh, sure, this seemed like a great idea at the time.  How cute!  I am alone with both of my babies!  I can have them sleep on my chest at the same time!

It was wonderful for a whole hour.  Then I got hungry and had to pee.  It was then that I realized the folly of my ways:

I would have to wake up both babies at the same time in order to do those things, and I had no backup.

Crap.

Well, that is what I did.  And then the rest of the day I was paying for it.  Immediately after I woke them up they were both, apparently, STARVING, and screaming about it.  So I fed them.  And then they were uncomfortable with gas.  So I burped them.  And then they didn’t like their placement, and wanted to be rocked or swing or vibrated.  So I did those things.  I dared at some point to go to the bathroom, and while I was in there Eitan started screaming bloody murder, so hard that his face turned purple and he stopped breathing.  HOW DARE YOU ABANDON ME!

This was the rest of my day.  There were some cute times.  They each got to go in the activity gym and work out.  They each did sleep, though of course not at the same time – except for a tiny stretch in the afternoon, and I was like SWEET! I am going to take a nap!  And then as soon as I lay down, they started fussing. OF COURSE.

Then the feeding frenzy that is double cluster feedings happened, starting at around 5pm each baby was eating every 45min – hour until 9pm.  I’ve been doing pretty well with my milk supply but I just can’t keep up to the demand of the evening feeding frenzy, so then they start getting frustrated at the boob and start screaming, which makes putting together bottles of formula all the more complicated as nobody wants to be put down.  (Can you hold two babies and make a bottle at the same time?  Where is my third hand??)  Meanwhile, Ilan came home from work and we were trying to eat dinner, but we only got to scarf things in between feedings because the screaming was just so intense.

Finally, they calmed down.  But only because they were both lying on someone (me or Ilan).

Cute, right?

But this isn’t how we can spend the night.  Not to mention it is bath night and both babies stank.  And I thought, well, baths always soothe the savage beast.

So again, both babies had to be woken up to do that.  Luckily I could move Noa onto Ilan so he could keep her quiet while I took Eitan, thus able to keep both babies satisfied even after waking them from their sweet slumber.

But, uh, bath time was not fun.  We have had baths three times a week since the umbilical cords fell off and they have always been these wonderful soothing experiences.  I put the baby in the tub and immediately he/she is quiet and relaxed, and it’s this wonderful time, followed by me giving him/her an infant massage and moisturizing.  Then they are all snuggly and relaxed and ready for bed.

NOT SO THIS TIME!

Screaming through bath time, screaming through toweling off, screaming through infant massage, screaming through moisturizing.


Ahh!!

It wasn’t until I was in the middle of clothing Noa (second bather) that I realized I had left something out of bath time.  I usually sing while I give them a bath.  I sing “Let’s Go Fly a Kite” from Mary Poppins (I have no idea why this song, I just started singing it the first time I gave them a bath and now it is the bath time song).  So Noa is screaming and I am putting on her jammies.  And then I start quietly singing the bath time song and she immediately relaxes.

I finished putting on her jammies and then snuggle with her a minute while still singing, and she is just so relaxed.

I put her over my shoulder and she holds on to me.  The most relaxed and calm she has been all day.  Like actually calm, not calm like I am about to rev up again I just need a break kind of calm.

It was a sweet moment. :)

Then I swaddled her and she started screaming again.  But whatevs.  Take what you can get, right?  Time for me to nap until they wake up for the first night feeding.